Never you mind.

by Irina Vorotyntseva
So much for my Sunday update streak. I was busy at work and then once I got home I felt like running out of the house for some tapioca pudding of all things. I had my brother go along with me, but in the end we ended up getting some chocolate raspberry sticks and cookie dough, along with two bouquets of flowers that I will take pictures of either today or tomorrow. They're fargin' gorgeous.

A couple of years back, my mom and I had a family feud with my grandparents. My mom's parents have never really treated her like she was their daughter and they would play games like sending me a gift on her birthday. Of course I didn't think that was right, so I sent the gift back and we hadn't spoken in years. Meanwhile my grandma has been getting sick and one day my mom just had this feeling that she needed to go and see her... and now everyone's getting together again.

The grandparents have been getting lonely what with their near entire family rejecting them and I suppose they've changed because of it? That's what my uncle says, anyway. So we had Thanksgiving with them. I hadn't been in that house for at least five years. I felt like everything was so much smaller than it used to be; I guess I've grown a bit.

When my grandpa came up to hug me I cringed inside. I couldn't really help it.

I'm thinking of Granma less and less, and trying to see things in his perspective. Like instead of thinking that he's ignoring me on purpose, I realize that people don't smile and wave every time they see their friends. Sometimes you just walk on by. I do that a lot with other people. I just feel hurt when Granma does it to me, because we used to be more than that. But like I said, I'm getting over him little by little.

The organic chemistry exam ended up going okay for me, at least with respect to the rest of the class. The high score was a 91%, the average was a 51%, and I got an 84%. She even wrote, "Wow, very nice!" on one of the problems I did. For the win! Still, learning all these mechanisms and differentiating between them is ridonkulously difficult. I'm starting to realize what people mean when they say that o-chem is hard.

Well, chidlins. Have a good week and stay warm.

I'll be waiting.

by Dilara Serçe
According to a coworker, I have the walk of a gunslinger. Whatever that means.

The other week my mom was being all prophetic when she was warning me about gaining winter weight. Well it happened, like it always does. Not by so much quite yet, but I did notice enough for me to check on the scales. Eight pounds? Eh. I just need to go back to my old eating habits again and not consume dessert every night.

Thanksgiving week is going to suck a lot. For one thing, I have an exam the day before that fateful holiday. Thank you, oh organic chemistry professor. Thanks so much. And I am stressing about it because I hardly know much of anything at all and I hardly have time to study for it. We'll see what happens.

Granma's being a butthead again. First he's all moody and then he comes and sits by me during lunch. He doesn't really listen when I talk to him, though. I was telling him about these new shirts that I got online while he was reading some comics from the newspaper, but all he managed was a vague nod and a preposterous excuse of a courtesy laugh when I chuckled at my own joke.

Hmm... I guess he's just the type of person who needs company but not a companion, you know what I mean? He said that's what he likes about me, that I don't talk much and that it's really annoying to be around people who chatter constantly. Hah. Of course.

But I'm getting mixed opinions on what I should do about Granma. One of them says I should wait it out because she is certain our relationship will blossom again eventually. Another says that it was never meant to be because we're too different in the sense that we have different opinions of what's fun to do and what will you have after that?

Encore!

by Rengim Mutevellioglu
Weekends feel the same as weekdays to me.

If you were wondering about how that whole shopping shindig with Granma went, it never happened. No, he didn't bail or anything. I just woke up the morning after and realized how shitloadious (yes, I did make that word up just now) my to-do list was and that it would be terribly irresponsible of me to blow it all off to spend time with Granma.

And if you know me, you know I'm responsible. No matter how much I procrastinate, I always get it done by the time I need it done.

Anyway. He said that "we'll figure something out" in response to my wanting to find another day to get together. I suggested several days but he hasn't responded, and I doubt that he will. I think he's back to his ignoring-me stage again. This whole rollercoaster thing is not to my taste.

I'm planning a holiday vacation in Arizona with the grandparents. In my quest through my planner, I discovered that I had no idea when my final exams are. So I looked them up, of course, only to find that I have all three of my finals BACK TO BACK ON THE SAME DAY. Just thinking about it stresses me out, and it's still plenty of weeks away.

Golly gee whiz, mister.

by MooNyk
My left leg is falling asleep. Rather violently, however, what with the stinging.

I hope time slows down a bit again. I noticed that the month of July went by really slowly and then from August until now, time has just flown by, and the only thing that can be related to the change is that I was with Granma in July.

Maybe we're making some progress. I fake-frown at him through the window sometimes while I'm working, because that's how we roll at work. After checking to see if anyone else was around first, he cheered me up by miming himself going down an elevator. It worked. He was pretty cute.

A coworker I don't like much or see often asked us if we were dating. I don't know what Granma did, but I just said no rather quietly. Afterwards I thought I should have said, "I wish!" but you never think of the best thing to say at the most opportune time.

But after that, he stopped to talk to me for no reason whatsoever. He's got a maintenance position now, so he was getting a wet washcloth from the breakroom while I was up there and sat beside me suddenly, just looking at me while I was listening to music on my iPod and then asked how I was.

"Uh. I'm pretty good. Are you on your break?"

"Nope."

"Oh. Alright. What's that for?" I asked, indicating the damp cloth laying across his knee.

"I've got to clean the tops of the vending machines downstairs."

"Sucks for you."

And the he gets up to leave to do said chore. I thought that was rather out of character for him, but I certainly didn't mind some sort of attention. Like instead of walking past the window without looking, he full on turns his body towards me and sticks his tongue out, now. He's more playful and less evasive. I like it.

I saw him leaving at the end of the night and he stopped to talk to me even though we were walking in separate directions.

"I didn't know we were getting out early tonight, so I was working hella slow."

"You didn't finish then?"

"Nope."

Then we started walking off on our own ways before I turned and shouted to him even though there were other people around.

"Want to hang out tomorrow!?"

He turns around, "Yeah, sure." Then keeps walking and remembers, "When?"

"After work."

"I'm meeting up with my parents after work."

"Oh." Then I turn to walk away, and then back, "What about before work then? I don't start until 3!"

By this time we were probably 50 feet away, shouting at each other, it was really ridiculous.

"I don't start until 1:30. Want to go to the mall?" At least, I think that's what he said.

"Yeah, okay. Email me!" And I had to rush off because I was holding everyone else up, but smiling like mad.

I don't want to make a big deal of it though, especially if it's not in the end. I try not to give my hopes up, but sometimes I just can't help it.

My email:
what are you shopping for? and when! and how!
i feel camera trigger happy so lemme take your picture, pleeease. pretty please?
oh, man. i'm gonna kick your butt if you don't respond to this email, too.

But he did email me back for the first time in two months:
well i responded, just three hrs later haha. i need to pick up a new pair of shoes. pics only if you got the velvet. bed time i'll call you in the morning.. smell you later

Velvet, referring to the incident where I asked to take his portrait before, and he said that he'd do it only if he was shirtless and laying in velvet. Ha-larious.

Should I be excited but potentially give my hopes up again? We're acting like we were before we started going out, again. Oh, I don't know. But I am currently rather happy.

Oh. It's November.

by Maria
I ended up not doing anything at all for Halloween. That's right, I didn't even watch any classic Halloween movies. I just sat on my bed with this computer on my lap reading Naruto manga until 1:30 in the morning.

Charissa keeps asking me thinks about why Granma is in such in such a mood and I always seem to have an answer for her. This sort of surprised me, because I didn't think we were talking enough for me to know things like this about him, but apparently we are. Which is nice, I guess. I was even grouchy and giving him dirty looks the whole day for reasons of a cruddy work day, but he still came to sit by me without me having to summon him over like I usually do.

He keeps doing annoying things, though, like removing his shirt in front of me, which is rather torturous when all I was really thinking about before was how much I wanted to just go over and touch him. Sometimes I think he does this on purpose. I've really got to confront him about it. "Look, you're giving me ideas when you do these things, so either stop torturing me or make out with me for freaks' sake." But he'd probably just stop torturing me, which would not have been the plan.

Granma said he was going to a Halloween party again this weekend. He's got a penguin costume, so it's like this long dress sort of thing that you have to waddle in, apparently. I thought that was pretty much awesome. What wasn't awesome was that Granma was sporting a 'stache of all things. I guess it was to "appear more mature" for some reason. Well, a bunch of people dressed up at work. One guy dressed as a woman, shaved legs and all. He had kids asking him if he was a man or a woman and was often told by the supervisors to stop touching himself. Ha-larious.

I've been having an exam every week these past couple of weeks, it's ridiculous. And here my mom is trying to get me to clean the bathroom and she's sitting on her bum crocheting. I could use a little help sometimes, too. But then again, here I am on this blog. Procrastinating. So. Whatever.