This medicine's not working.

Coming into work today was torturous to the point of extensive cranial pressure. That sounds worse than it is, but for whatever reason I have the need to bawl at arrival. It seems like each new school semester I have an urge to quit work, or school, or both, because of the pressure of getting everything done on time and adequately. I feel weaker than I was a few years ago, because I don't have as much determination to succeed as I once had.

Maybe it's because I don't know where I'm going with all of this, or what the point is. I don't think it's right that we have to work all of our lives only to have a little bit of pleasure at the end of it when we can't even take full advantage due to our decrepitness. I want to be able to live this stupid life the way I want to, and I want everyone to be able to be happy, as well, and on their own terms. I'm wasting my youth away.

On a less melodramatic note, until tonight I had never seen the clouds so clearly at nighttime. It was so beautiful, I just kept staring at it despite the fact that I was making me veer off the lane a little bit on the freeway. It was okay, really. There aren't many cars around at 10 o'clock in the evening.

I suppose that'll be one of my antidotes to wasting away; taking the time to appreciate the beauty in life. And humor. Can't forget about humor.